


If Only

by lionwolves



Series: As If Universe [3]
Category: A Song of Ice and Fire - George R. R. Martin, Game of Thrones (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-04-17
Updated: 2019-11-30
Packaged: 2020-01-15 14:58:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 6,936
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18501349
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lionwolves/pseuds/lionwolves
Summary: Seven years after Oberyn and Cersei ended their relationship and parted ways, they meet again by chance. Will they resist a reconciliation that would surely complicate their lives or will they give in to the feelings and desires which they thought were left firmly in the past?





	1. Reunion

Cersei takes a glass of champagne from a tray that a waiter passes by with. 

Though she hardly wanted to be at the event, hosted by the Tyrells, it was undoubtedly important for networking and garnering more high-profile clientele for her law firm. 

As she sips the champagne, she scans the crowd of attendees, some familiar to her and others not, and spots someone she can’t quite believe is there. 

_ Oberyn Martell.  _

She had not seen him since their relationship ended, almost seven years ago to the date. Truthfully, she hadn’t realized that she had been keeping track of the time subconsciously.

_What is he doing here? He should be... where should he be at this point? She couldn’t recall._

She assumed that he was still away traveling, and no one had even informed her that he returned, and certainly not that he would be here at the same event as her.

Studying him, she notices that he now has a trimmed beard and has let his hair grow out some more. The look suits him, she thinks, but quickly moves on from that thought.

Just as she realizes that she may have been staring for too long, he turns and catches her gaze. He is clearly surprised to see her, but his eyes shine and his smile is soft as he prepares to walk over.

“How is it possible?” Oberyn begins in lieu of a normal greeting.

“How is what possible?”

“That you’ve become even more stunning since the last time I saw you,” He says smoothly. 

Cersei shakes her head at his flirting. “You look... good.”

“Thank you,” Oberyn replies.

She decides to cut to the chase. “What are you doing here?” 

Oberyn clears his throat and moves closer to her. “I, uh, came back because Doran is very ill,” He says quietly. 

“I’m so sorry, Oberyn, I hadn’t heard,” Cersei says.

“No. We’ve kept it quiet. As with my return... that was until I decided that I’m going to stay.”

She glares at him in surprise. “You are?”

“I am. I need to be here for Doran and my family now, to take over running our company while he can’t. Of course, Arianne is convinced that she is already old enough to do so,” He finishes with a chuckle at his niece. 

Cersei laughs lightly, fondly remembering her time with a younger, already bold Arianne during the years that she and Oberyn were together. “I’m sure that she is, but I know you’ll do well in the position instead.”

“Do you really think so?”

“I know that you’re one of the smartest people I’ve ever met. I imagine CEO will be a walk in the park for you.”

Oberyn smiles, that genuine, wide smile that she had missed.

“But it can’t be easy to leave the life you led,“ She adds.

“No, but after awhile, it wasn’t always so fulfilling. I missed my family, I missed home... I missed...” He trails off as if he wanted to say ‘I missed you’, but he lets it go.

It hangs in the air like the tension between them.

“Besides,” He continues. “I have two little girls now, and it will be much better to raise them here with family.”

Cersei manages only a half-smile at that, with a hint of disappointment that she didn’t expect to feel. “Oh? What are their names?” 

“Obara and Tyene,” He answers.

“Very beautiful names,” She responds kindly. “And are you married?”

“No, definitely not,” He says as if the very thought is preposterous. 

_‘I wanted to marry you.’ His words from many years ago, as things were ending between them, fill her head. And it seems clear to her that he has remained unmarried for a reason._

“I... heard about you and Stannis... Congratulations...” Oberyn tells her, though his tone is strained. 

 “Thank you,” She replies.

“All is well with work, though, I assume?” 

“Yes, it is. I just recently won a very important case,” She responds proudly. 

“That’s amazing, Cers,” He praises. “It seems like you have your perfect life, then.”

“I don’t know about that,” She replies.

“Well, as long as you’re happy...”

To her, it sounds much more like a question than a statement. Of course she’s happy. Isn’t she? Yet, in that moment, she suddenly isn’t sure.

Cersei has never been more grateful for her husband’s arrival than that very moment.

“Stannis!” Oberyn greets, extending his hand. “Hello.”

“Oberyn,” Stannis says evenly, clearly not as thrilled to see him as he shakes his hand. “I didn’t expect to see you here... I heard you were still out of the country.”

“I’ve just recently returned, actually,” Oberyn tells him and nothing more.

Cersei remembers then that Stannis once represented another corporation in a lawsuit against the Martells, so he wouldn’t tell want to tell Stannis that Doran is ill or that he is here to take his place and signal any company instability, and she decides then that she won’t betray his trust by doing so either.

“I was just catching up with your beautiful wife,” Oberyn continues.

“I can see that,” Stannis answers.

Cersei is certain that Stannis means to pull them away for some reason, but his phone rings. Most likely Davos because of work, she thinks. 

“Excuse me,” Stannis says to them before he walks away to take the call.

“I was thinking that the group of us, or whoever is around right now, we should get together and catch up. Is Jaime around or is he on the road?” Oberyn suggests.

“Jaime is home for the rest of the season... or indefinitely. His right hand is... broken...“

“Cers, I’m so sorry to hear that. I know he must be—“

“Crushed,” She finishes, looking away sadly. 

Oberyn nods in understanding. “Do you think he’d mind me stopping by?”

“You can try. I haven’t the faintest clue what’s going on in his mind right now,” She tells him. “But perhaps you can convince him to leave the house and join us all one day.”

“Even if it’s just me, you, him, and Lya,” Oberyn adds. “Like old times.” 

“Like old times,” She repeats.

_ If only.  _

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed this first chapter! More chapters to come and more to be revealed soon!


	2. Surprise

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oberyn makes a visit to Jaime and Lyanna’s house, and meets little Jon.

Oberyn drives up to the address that Cersei sent to him, taking a look at the large house before he steps out of his coupe.

Ringing the doorbell, he waits patiently even after no one answers. He had assumed that they were home, judging by the three cars parked in the driveway. 

Just before he turns away, the door opens to reveal a disheveled Lyanna, her dark hair in a messy bun and wearing what he recognizes as one of Jaime’s college sweatshirts.

A smile crosses her face as soon as she sees him. “Oberyn!”

“Hi, Lya,” Oberyn greets as he pulls her into a tight hug. “How are you?”

“I’m fine. I was just chasing this rugrat of mine around the house,” Lyanna answers, shaking her head. “Come in.”

She moves aside so that Oberyn can step inside the door and walk into the entryway.

The toddler in question stands curiously to the side and stares at him as Lyanna closes the door behind them. 

“Jon, right?” Oberyn asks Lyanna.

“Jon, say hello to mommy’s friend, Oberyn,” Lyanna instructs.

Jon approaches him slowly and hesitantly.

Oberyn kneels down to Jon’s height and shakes his little hand. “Hello, Jon.”

“Hi,” Jon responds.

“You can go play while Oberyn and I talk, okay?” Lyanna says to her son gently.

Jon nods to his mother and scurries off up the stairs.

“He’s adorable,” Oberyn tells her. “And looks exactly like you.”

“Thank you,” Lyanna responds as she turns back to him. “And yes, fortunately he does.” 

Oberyn nods in understanding. Even though he had been gone, he is still familiar with that situation, which had been occurring on and off since high school. 

“Is he… around and there for him?” Oberyn asks, referring to Rhaegar.

“He tries his best to be, and that’s the least he can do,” Lyanna answers, strain evident in her tone. “Anyway! I’m very happy to see you back.”

“Yes, I wanted to surprise you and Jaime.”

Lyanna clears her throat. “Well, Cersei did tell me you would be stopping by, just not when...”

“Oh, of course she did,” Oberyn says with a sigh. “That sure hasn’t changed, has it?” 

“No, it hasn’t,” Lyanna replies with a smile.

“She told me what happened with Jaime...how is he?”

“He is… upstairs,” Lyanna answers plainly.

Nodding, Oberyn makes his way up the stairs and into the hallway on the second floor. He pauses when he hears the sound of a television playing a football game. 

He follows the sound until he reaches a bedroom with the door open and finds Jaime sitting back in a recliner. He notices that his right hand is covered in a cast.

“Martell?!” Jaime exclaims in utter surprise at seeing him.

“Lannister,” Oberyn says easily, leaning against the doorframe.

Jaime quickly turns down the volume of the television with his left hand. “What the hell are you doing here?“

“Back home or in your house?”

“Both,” Jaime says. 

“Well, Doran is ill. Very ill, and I came back to be with him and my family and to run the company while he can’t.”

“I’m so sorry to hear that,” Jaime says. “Give him my regards.”

Oberyn looks at him with concern. “I will... but I’m here because I wanted to check on you... how are you?”

Jaime lifts up his hand with the cast.

“I’m done, Martell,” He says bitterly.

“You can’t look at it like it’s over yet, man,” Oberyn tells him. “It’s not over until it’s over, right?”

Jaime can’t help but snicker at the statement, something he had told Oberyn once.

“It could really be over. They said that—“

“Since when did you listen to what people say?” Oberyn interjects. “Look, I’m not saying it’s going to be some miracle, but you’re still healing. If you get back out there and you can’t do it, then you can’t do it. But if you give up now, call it quits, then maybe you’ll never know...”

Jaime sighs, but he finds that he can’t argue with that logic.

“Besides, with the career you’ve had, Jaime. The passing records you’ve broken— you’ve done more than players who’ve had even longer careers than you.”

“I know,” Jaime says. “That’s what makes it worse.”

Oberyn looks up at one of the many commemorative footballs in a case on the wall, celebrating various achievements throughout Jaime’s career. Some of which, he was there to see. 

“How are you, man?” Jaime asks, softly.

“I’m glad to be back home.”

“Really? I thought you were living the life out there traveling.”

Oberyn shrugs. “I suppose... It was fun, sure, but after awhile, I started to feel like something was missing.”

“I might know what was missing.”

Oberyn quirks an eyebrow at him. “Oh, do you?”

“Her,” Jaime simply says. 

“Yes. I could walk the entire earth and never find a woman that can match up to your sister...”

“Have you seen her since you’ve been back?”

“I have,” Oberyn replies. “She looks amazing. I almost couldn’t believe she married Stannis, but I suppose it makes sense.”

Jaime nods.

“Is she happy?”

Jaime pauses for a brief moment to consider. “I don’t know. I know she’s not happy like she was with you.. it doesn’t mean she isn’t now, it’s just different. Everything is different.”

“I think she was happiest when she had both of us,” Oberyn tells him, and they share a knowing glance for a moment.

“Yes, and now you’re back. What are you going to do, Martell?”

Oberyn laughs at his presumptuousness. “There’s nothing I can do...she moved on...she’s married now... and I have to respect that, no matter how I felt seeing her again.”

Jaime scoffs. “You didn’t let anything stop you when you kept going after her in high school. You may have irritated the hell out of me, but I always somewhat admired your persistence.”

“This isn’t high school anymore, Jaime...We’re not those kids with no responsibilities. It’s not that simple anymore,” Oberyn retorts. 

“It‘s never been simple for her and I,” Jaime says. “And yet...” 

“What do you want me to do, Jaime? Try to get back with her? Disturb her life and break up her marriage? I love and respect her way too much to do that,” Oberyn says. 

“I want you to stop acting like it’s actually over,” Jaime fires back. “Like you’re not still the love of her life, and that’s coming from me. What you two had— you don’t ever move on something from that.”

Oberyn’s gaze flickers away as he considers the truth of Jaime’s words. 

“You know I’m right,” Jaime says smugly. 

“I still hate you, you know,” Oberyn tells him.

Jaime smiles fondly at that. “Oh, I know.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed this chapter with Jaime, Oberyn, Lyanna, and of course a cameo appearance from little Jon! Let me know if you enjoyed it and stay tuned for more chapters soon!


	3. Double Date

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cersei and Stannis have dinner with Ned and Catelyn.

“Stan?” Cersei calls out to her husband as she sets her purse down in the living area. 

If Stannis is in his study, further back in their house, he likely won’t be able to hear her, hence the lack of a response.

Cersei strolls through the den and passes the library before she finds him sitting at the desk in his study. His briefcase is opened as he views case papers. 

“Why did you leave work only to come home to do more?” Cersei asks, moving around his desk to face him.

Stannis leans in to meet her lips in a quick kiss and turns back to his cases. “I wanted to get some things done before Ned and Cat arrive later for dinner.”

“Right,” Cersei responds with a sigh. “I’d almost forgotten...“

Though they might not have otherwise stayed in such close contact with their high school and college friends, Ned being a colleague of Stannis helped the couples stay in close contact, and Cersei and Catelyn manage to act as though their high school rivalry never existed.

“Did you already know that Oberyn had returned before that event?” Stannis asks her, cutting straight to the point.

_ Here we go,_  Cersei thinks.

“I had no idea. I was as shocked as you were to see him there.”

Stannis huffs in disbelief. “By the looks of it, you were happy to see him.” 

“Don’t go there,” Cersei retorts. 

“I‘m not an idiot, Cersei,” He says, placing a paper back into his briefcase and turning around in his chair. 

“Oh, far from it. That’s why I can hardly believe you’re entertaining whatever notion this is.”

“I know how much you loved him... remember, I was your friend for all those years. I was there. When you denied having feelings for him... while you were together all those years... when it ended. So don’t insult my intelligence by telling me that I have nothing to worry about.”

“It has been seven years, Stannis...”

“And in all that time, you didn’t think about him? Didn’t miss him?”

“It doesn’t matter,” Cersei replies.

Stannis frowns. “What do you mean it doesn’t matter? Of course it—“

“Because I chose you!” She exclaims. “You.”

Stannis opens his mouth to protest, but closes it immediately as she continues. 

“I chose to be with you. I chose to marry you... I chose you... that’s what matters and that doesn’t change just because he came back...” 

Finally, Stannis looks up to meet her eyes. 

“I love you,” Cersei says to him, her tone softened.

It is not something either of them say to each other very often, regardless of how true it is.

“I love you, too,” Stannis replies.

***

Cersei laughs as she pours more wine into her and Catelyn’s glasses. 

“That really happened?” Ned asks, sitting adjacent to Stannis at the dinner table.

Catelyn nods. “Yes, darling, it definitely did. We couldn’t remember anything that had happened the night before.”

“And I’m running around trying to find out what everyone remembers, while we’re all dreadfully hungover, and who do I find in the kitchen making breakfast? This one,” Cersei continues, nodding towards Cat.

“Well, you can’t fight a hangover on an empty stomach,” Catelyn responds as she takes another sip of wine.

Ned chuckles and looks towards Stannis, who simply shakes his head.

Cersei knows that Stannis has heard this story at some point or another, even parts that she would prefer to leave out, and that he doesn’t enjoy it. 

“I suppose we’ve changed quite a lot since those days,” Catelyn comments with a smirk. 

Cersei nods her head in agreement. It is true, she thinks. Then, she was dating Oberyn but is now married to Stannis, while Catelyn was dating Brandon but is now married to Ned. Completely different types of men. That, if anything, perfectly evidences just how much things have changed.

“I’d like to think that we grew up,” Cersei corrects.

Yet for a moment, Cersei wonders if she is doomed to go backwards and repeat the past.

“How is little Robb?” Stannis asks either Ned or Catelyn, as if he wanted to change the subject in some form.

“Oh, he’s fine,” Ned answers. “Active and adventurous as ever since the moment he started walking.”

Catelyn beams proudly. “Yes. He gives us a run for our money, but I wouldn’t have it any other way.”

“He’s such an adorable boy,” Cersei says.

“Thank you. And when are you two going to have some little ones?” Catelyn asks.

Cersei and Stannis instantly lock eyes at her question. They had hardly even discussed the possibility of having children, still fairly early on in their marriage.

Since they’d gotten married, their primary focus had been on succeeding in their careers, and although they tried to prioritize each other, it was clear that there was currently no room in their lives for starting a family. 

Cersei was unsure that they even wanted children, even if they could right now. Stannis wasn’t exactly the most nurturing type who was eager to become a father, and she wasn’t sure if she wanted it enough to force it on him.

“When we actually have time for it, with our careers,” Cersei answers, though she knows the honest answer is more complicated than that.

“We’re in no rush,” Stannis adds.

“Of course, that’s completely understandable,” Catelyn says, with a thin smile. 

Ned downs the last of his drink and checks his watch. “Speaking of time, it’s a little late. We should probably get back to the babysitter.”

Catelyn nods to her husband. “Yes, we should, but this was wonderful as always.”

“It was,” Cersei agrees, and there is at least some truth to it.

After walking them to the door, Stannis shakes hands with Ned while Cersei and Catelyn share a quick hug.

Stannis stands behind Cersei as they watch them drive away before closing the door.

“I thought they’d never leave,” Stannis says through clenched teeth. 

Cersei laughs at her husband’s remark. “I’m usually the one that says that.”

“Let’s go to bed.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed this chapter with Cersei/Stannis and Ned/Cat! The anecdote that Catelyn and Cersei were telling is a reference to my fic “Spring Break” set in this universe, so please check that out if you haven’t!


	4. Strictly Business

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As the new CEO of Martell International, Oberyn elicits Cersei’s legal services for a lawsuit against his company, but will their past feelings prevent them from keeping things strictly professional?

“Mrs. Lannister.”

 

Cersei looks up from the case file on her desk and sees her assistant peeking into her office.

 

“What is it?”

 

“The CEO of Martell International is on the line for you,” She answers. 

 

Cersei’s first thought is Doran, and she wonders why he would contact her. They hadn’t talked since before she and Oberyn broke up. Until she remembers that Doran is no longer the CEO. Oberyn is.

 

She swallows. “Did he mention what it was regarding?”

 

“No,” Her assistant responds. “Simply that he needed to speak to you about a matter of business.”

 

“Transfer him,” Cersei tells her. 

 

Though it slightly worries her, she knows she can’t avoid him forever now that he is back. 

 

Cersei lets her phone ring twice before she picks it up. “Oberyn.”

 

“Cersei, how are you?” 

 

“I’m fine. And you?” She asks, practically through gritted teeth because she hates the formality of it and wishes he would just cut to the point.

 

“I’m just attempting to adjust to this position,” Oberyn responds casually.

 

Cersei sighs. “Oberyn, why did you call? Besides, you have my personal number.”

 

“This is a matter of business, so I contacted your office.”

 

“What business?” She asks. 

 

Oberyn lowers his voice. “Legal business, which I would rather us speak in person about. Whatever day or time suits you, but for sake of confidentiality, I would prefer we meet in my office.” 

 

“Tomorrow at noon,” Cersei replies even quicker than he had expected. 

 

“That works for me.”

 

***

 

At noon the next day, Cersei heads outside of her office building to walk to her car.

 

“Mrs. Lannister?” She hears to her left.

 

Turning, she sees that the source of the voice is a chauffeur standing in front of a Bentley. 

 

_He didn’t_ , she thinks to herself.

 

“Mr. Martell sent me to pick you up so that you didn’t have to bother with driving to your meeting with him.”

 

“Of course he did,” Cersei responds with acordial smile at the man. 

 

The chauffeur opens the backseat for her and she reluctantly enters the car.

 

“There are waters and drinks in the cooler next to you, and you can change the music to your preference,” The man says as he drives off. 

 

Cersei can hardly believe that Oberyn went this far with a grand gesture, but then again, it is perfectly like him to do something like this. Of course, that was when they were dating and he would surprise her with gifts and romantic getaways. 

 

Now, it just seems unnecessary unless he is trying to win her back at a time in her life that it is impossible to do so. He knows that, so why make it difficult?

 

Lost in her thoughts about Oberyn, Cersei doesn’t notice that they have arrived until the chauffeur opens the door for her.

 

Stepping out, she looks up at the tower that holds the many offices of Martell International. 

 

As soon as she enters the lobby, Oberyn is there waiting for her, wearing a perfectly tailored, striped black suit with a red tie and looking every bit the CEO as he is supposed to. 

 

“The Bentley? Really?” Cersei immediately asks.

 

Oberyn shrugs innocently as if he doesn’t understand her problem. “It was only a gesture of kindness in advance of our meeting.“

 

“But you do know what it looked like.”

 

“It’s just business, Cersei,” Oberyn responds. “Shall we?”

 

He resists the urge to offer his arm or take her hand.

 

Cersei follows him to the elevator, which only the two of them enter. 

 

The tension quickly rises between them in the small space as the elevator rises floors.

 

Cersei feels his gaze on her, but when she turns to look at him, he flickers it away. 

 

Finally, the elevator reaches the floor of his office and he beckons her to exit ahead of him. 

 

His office, or Doran’s former office, is extremely spacious and there are certain decorative details that indicate that he has made it his own. 

 

Artwork by one of his favorite painters and a silver stereo system, neatly placed so that it still looks professional. 

 

“Sit, please,” Oberyn tells her. 

 

Cersei takes a seat in the chair across from his desk and places her purse in the other chair. “So what is this urgent legal business?”

 

“I’ve barely been able to get my feet wet as CEO before this falls into my lap. A case they’ve evidently been building since before I took over, but decided to spring it now at what appears to be a weak time in our company. It’s the Boltons... alleging breach of contract and fraud.”

 

“Is there substantial evidence?” Cersei questions.

 

Oberyn shakes his head. “I don’t know, but apparently it’s enough to make a huge hit to our company. They have very high quality representation.”

 

“Well, I can recommend you a short list of corporate attorneys who would be—“ 

 

“I don’t want you to recommend anyone. I want you,” Oberyn interjects.

 

The last part shocks her for a moment.

 

Oberyn clears his throat when he realizes how it sounded. “I meant... I want you to represent my company. I know that I’m not going to find a better, smarter, more capable lawyer than you, Cersei... please.” 

 

In that moment, looking into his pleading brown eyes, she considers everything. She considers the risks and what them working closely together could lead to. She thinks of Stannis, and how much he won’t like her working for or with Oberyn. 

 

On the other hand, she realizes, if she wins this case for one of the biggest corporations in the country and they become her client, it will practically make her whole career early on. Perhaps it is worth all the risks and more. 

 

“I’ll do it,” She finally replies. “I’ll take the case.”

 

Oberyn’s entire face lights up as he smiles. “You don’t know what this means to me.” 

 

“I think I do.”

 

“Thank you, Cersei,” He says, reaching out to grab her hand in his. 

 

Cersei looks down at their joined hands and then up to meet his gaze. 

 

It had been so long since they had touched that it felt almost electric. Even more, it felt as though all their past feelings had come rushing back at once. 

 

Shocked, Cersei pulls her hand away before grabbing her purse and walking away. “I have to get back.”

 

“I didn’t mean to overstep! I’m sorry,” Oberyn says to her as he moves to follow her.

 

Cersei glances back at him before she exits his office. “Don’t be.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I finally updated after a month. If you enjoy or have been following this story, let me know!


	5. Futile Resistance

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After accepting the case for Martell International, Cersei avoids revealing the news to Stannis by making a visit to Jaime and Lyanna’s house. Their advice is not what she expected.

In order to clear her mind, Cersei decides to go for a run around her neighborhood.

 

It hardly helps and she feels her thoughts and worries rushing through her head at an even faster pace.

 

Panting, she comes to a stop and since she is not yet ready to face Stannis, she decides to head to somewhere safe that is not her own home. 

 

Cersei knocks on the door a few times before Jaime finally answers.

 

“Hey, Cers,” Jaime says, stepping aside for her to enter.

 

She breezes past her brother into his house and continues walking to the kitchen. 

 

Because she knows her way around, she grabs a water bottle from the fridge before Jaime joins her in the kitchen.

 

“What’s wrong?” Jaime asks, simply.

 

Cersei frowns at him. “Why does something have to be wrong?”

 

“Because I know you and it is.”

 

“I’m just stopping by as I always do. Where’s Lyanna? Is she not home?” Cersei asks, reverting the subject.

 

“No, she’s taking Jon to day care. She should be back soon,” Jaime answers before changing the subject back. “Are you okay?” 

 

Cersei nods as she paces around the kitchen taking intermittent sips from her water bottle.

 

“Cersei,” Jaime begins, easily at first before his tone changes to a more stern one. “Cersei, stop.”

 

At that, she turns around to face him and he approaches her slowly. “Please breathe.”

 

Cersei takes a deep breath and follows it with another.

 

“Good,” Jaime assures her as she continues. “Come here.”

 

She moves into his arms and lays her head against his chest.

 

“Is it Stannis?”

 

Cersei groans in negation.

 

“Is it Father?”

 

She clicks her teeth. 

 

Jaime pauses for awhile to think. 

 

“Is it Oberyn?” He finally asks, having an inclination that might be it. 

 

She remains silent, which Jaime understands. 

 

“He came by here,” Jaime says softly as he rubs circles into her back. “It was good to see him, but I was worried about how you were handling it. I just didn’t want to ask until you were ready to talk.” 

 

“I took a case representing Martell International. It will be huge for my career, but Jaime... winning the case isn’t the hard part at all,” Cersei begins. 

 

“Of course... not for you,” Jaime tells her.

 

“The hard part is being around him again, resisting the effect of those feelings that I’d like to think have gone away but I know they haven’t.” 

 

Jaime nods. “I know.”

 

Cersei settles against him for a moment of silence.

 

“Perhaps you shouldn’t be resisting them.”

 

She lifts her head up to look at him. “What?!”

 

Jaime shrugs. “Like I told him, the love that you two had, it doesn’t just go away. There’s no point in resisting it.”

 

“The point is that I’m married, Jaime.”

 

“Does that stop us?”

 

“Nothing stops us. We’re—“

 

“Forever? I agree, but how can you be sure that you and Oberyn aren’t too?” 

 

Cersei glares at him for a moment. “Why can’t you be jealous and discouraging where it concerns Oberyn and I like you are with every other relationship I’ve been in with a man?”

 

“I got over that a long time ago once I knew that he wasn’t going anywhere, so I thought there was no point.”

 

The two of them don’t notice that Lyanna has arrived home until she enters the kitchen.

 

“Lya,” Cersei says, pulling away from Jaime.

 

“It’s just me. You don’t have to do that,” Lyanna says, regarding Cersei for a moment. “Are you alright?”

 

Jaime silently mouths ‘no’ to her and follows it with ‘Oberyn.’ 

 

Lyanna nods. “Do you want to talk about it?”

 

“We tried that,” Jaime tells her.

 

“Yes, but you give terrible advice, babe,” Lyanna says to Jaime. “No, don’t make that face. It’s true.” 

 

“You’re not kidding,” Cersei mumbles. “He told me to not resist my feelings for Oberyn.”

 

Lyanna angles her head in consideration. “Well...”

 

“No... no,” Cersei replies. “Not you too.” 

 

Jaime raises an eyebrow. “Oh? I’m right?”

 

“I wouldn’t put it the same way as he did, but... It was just very easy to ignore and move on with another man when Oberyn was half a world away and you were banking on that continuing because you probably thought you’d never see him again, but now he’s back and that changes things significantly,” Lyanna explains.

 

Cersei sighs. “What are you saying, Lya?” 

 

“I’m saying you shouldn’t beat yourself up about it or stress yourself out over trying to resist your feelings because... it’s inevitable that it’ll happen so you may as well let it.” 

 

“Exactly!” Jaime exclaims in agreement. 

 

Cersei scoffs. “I think you’re both forgetting something. My husband. You know, Stannis Baratheon?”

 

“Well, he is pretty easy to forget,” Jaime comments, which makes Lyanna snicker.

 

“And I think  you’re forgetting that you aren’t perfect, Cersei. So stop trying to be,” Lyanna says bluntly. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally updated this, and it’s a very short, filler chapter, but it’s something. More plot coming soon.


	6. Endings

Cersei doesn’t make it home until later in the evening, and she expects Stannis to still be at his office.

 

It is a relief because it gives her more time to avoid delivering what he will receive as bad news about her new case.

 

Entering the kitchen, she is confused by the sight of bags of takeout food and a new bottle of her favorite wine sitting on the counter. 

 

“Cersei?” She hears Stannis call from the top of the stairs, and it startles her. 

 

“Were you expecting someone else?” Cersei asks.

 

Stannis frowns at that. “What? No. I ordered takeout from one of our favorite places and I thought we could have a quiet night in.”

 

“You’re home quite early.”

 

“Yes. I know that I’ve been working very late recently except when we have another engagement like a dinner party, but I haven’t given much priority to us, to you,” He explains.

 

Cersei swallows, feeling immediately guilty that he is performing such a sweet, rare gesture while she is hiding things from him. “That’s... nice, Stan.”

 

“You can sit down and relax. I’ll get everything out.” 

 

Additionally, the thought occurs to her that Stannis has an ulterior motive for doing this. He isn’t one for romantic gestures by any means. That isn’t even something that Jaime is known for, though he tries. It is much more like Oberyn. She wonders if he is doing this because of his insecurities about Oberyn being around again. 

 

Cersei nods and walks upstairs to change into comfortable clothes. 

 

Once she returns, they sit down to have a nice, quiet dinner in front of the living room television.

 

Stannis clears his throat. “Is there something we need to talk about?”

 

Cersei immediately feels concerned about what he could be implying. “What do you mean?”

 

“When we had dinner with Ned and Catelyn, they asked about children. You seemed disappointed that we don’t have them or don’t see ourselves having them in the near future. Is that something you want? Do you feel that it’s missing from our life? Our marriage?” 

 

Although she feels relieved that it isn’t anything else, Cersei dreads answering this question. 

 

“I wasn’t disappointed. I’m not, actually. I don’t really think about it. We’re still young and very early in our marriage,” Cersei answers.

 

“But do you want children? Eventually?”

 

“Do you?”

 

“I don’t think I’m cut out to be a father, but if you wanted...” Stannis hesitates. 

 

Cersei shakes her head before she interjects. “No. If you don’t think you’re cut out to be a father or you don’t want to be, we shouldn’t have them solely because I want to, if I did. That’s not how this marriage should work. This is a partnership, remember.” 

 

“Yes, I know, but a partnership has to work for the benefit of us both, meaning that sometimes we have to compromise,” Stannis contends. 

 

“That’s not compromise, Stannis. That’s forcing yourself to do something you don’t want to do... for me. You can’t compromise on matters like having children, marriage, or moving away. I won’t force you to do anything.”

 

“Not being able to agree on even one of those things can end relationships. You should know that,” Stannis tells her.

 

Cersei does indeed know that, and she remembers the reason why. 

 

***

 

_Arthur Dayne and Elia Martell’s wedding was a marvelous affair, outdoors at the Martell’s summer estate in Dorne._

 

_Not only in the exquisiteness of the decorations and the food, but in how truly happy everyone was for them, especially those that had seen their relationship grow and blossom since high school._

 

_It was a sort of reunion of the friends they’d attended school with, whether they’d kept in close touch or not._

 

_Cersei sat at a table with Jaime, Lyanna, Catelyn and her wedding date, Ned. Catelyn had so recently broken up with Brandon, who sits at another table with Ashara._

 

_The empty seat next to her was reserved for Oberyn, but he is already up at the altar as Arthur’s best man._

 

_After Doran walks Elia down the aisle, the wedding ceremony begins._

 

_Cersei can’t help but imagine her own wedding as she listens to their vows._

 

_In her naive innocence when she was younger, she used to imagine marrying Jaime, but that was impossible. Besides, she knew they would be forever wed in bond and spirit._

 

_However, she hardly feels as though it is anymore possible that she will marry Oberyn. She knows that he simply isn’t the type for marriage, even monogamy is a stretch, though that isn’t necessarily a precondition for either their current relationship or a marriage._

 

_Part of her knows that this is something that they should discuss. It concerns their future, but even that seems more blight as of recently. The plans that she thought they both agreed on are starting to break down, but Oberyn seems convinced that nothing is wrong._

 

_Once the ceremony is over and the reception is about to begin, Oberyn rejoins  them at the table._

 

_“It was an absolutely lovely ceremony,” Catelyn comments._

 

_“It was,” Oberyn responds, leaning back in his chair and throwing his arm around the back of Cersei’s. “So, who do you think will be the next of our group to get married?”_

 

_The question surprises Cersei. She didn’t realize he was even thinking about it._

 

_Jaime simply laughs. “Who knows.”_

 

_“You too?” Oberyn nods to Jaime and Lyanna._

 

_“Come on now, be serious,” Lyanna responds, which makes Jaime smirk._

 

_“You two have been together the longest,” Catelyn says, meaning Oberyn and Cersei. She and Brandon previously held that spot before they broke up._

 

_“That’s true,” Oberyn says as she glances over at Cersei. “We have.”_

 

_Cersei shakes her head. “Yes, but that doesn’t mean we’re going to get married.”_

 

_“Why not?” Oberyn asks._

 

_“You’re not getting married to anyone,” Cersei tells him._

 

_That makes the whole table laugh, except Oberyn himself, who seems more offended than anything, but he doesn’t reply._

 

_Cersei expects that this won’t be the last time they discuss it._

 

_She is, in fact, right._

 

_That night, once they’ve settled back into their shared bedroom in his family’s estate, she can feel the tense energy._

 

_Taking off his tie, Oberyn sighs deeply._

 

_“Oberyn...” Cersei begins. “I think we need to talk.”_

 

_He turns around to face her. “About what? How you’re convinced that I don’t want to marry you?”_

 

_“That’s not what I said.”_

 

_“It’s what you meant.”_

 

_“I just know you. I know that you’re not the marriage type, and that’s fine. I would never force you to be no matter what I want,” Cersei explains._

 

_“It doesn’t matter. I love you, Cersei. I want to be with you for the rest of my life. Of course I want to marry you.”_

 

_“Just because you love someone doesn’t automatically mean that you should marry them. Love isn’t the only thing that’s going to make a marriage work, it’s not even the only thing that’s going to make a relationship work. We already know that.”_

_“We already know that?”_

 

_“How can you be so oblivious to the fact that things aren’t going well?”_

 

_Oberyn shrugs. “We’ll work it out.”_

 

_“The long distance almost killed us, Oberyn. But we knew that being apart was a necessary sacrifice because we were working towards our end goal, our plans we made of being together and established in our careers so that we’d have our lives figured out by the time we were ready to get married, but now those plans have fallen apart.”_

 

_“Because I dropped out of medical school?!” Oberyn asks. “I’m sorry if that messes up your plans, but I didn’t want to do it anymore, Cersei.”_

 

_“I wasn’t trying to make you do something that you didn’t want to do to fit my plans, but those plans gave me a sense of certainty and security that we had a future. That’s all I wanted.”_

 

_“Cersei...” Oberyn begins._

 

_“So what you dropped out of med school! The problem is that now you don’t know what you want to instead, do you?”_

 

_“No.”_

 

_Cersei sighs deeply. “I know you want to travel and find yourself, and that’s fine. It really is, but you cannot expect me to always be here waiting for you whenever you decide to return. That’s not fair to me. My life continues to go on. I have my own goals and plans to achieve, with or without you.”_

 

_Oberyn nods. “You’re right. It’s not fair to me to expect you to wait for me to sort myself out.”_

 

_“Do you see what I mean? How can we get married if we can’t even get this relationship right?” Cersei asks, with a hint of amusement._

 

_Oberyn lets out a breathy laugh. “You’re right.”_

 

_Cersei joins him in lightly laughing._

 

_“I wanted to marry you,” He says, solemnly. “I really did.”_

 

_“I know.”_

 

_“This can’t be it...” Oberyn says after a long silence._

 

_Cersei feels herself holding back tears when he says that. “I’m afraid that it is.”_

 

***

 

Coming back to reality, Cersei looks over at Stannis. “I know those things can end relationships, but I’m not going to let it end ours. No matter what.”

 

Stannis glares at her. “Why?”

 

“You are my friend before anything else. My partner. You understand my ambitions better than anyone else, and that’s why this works so well. I won’t lose that. I can’t.”

 

Nodding, Stannis reaches over and takes a sip of wine. 

 

“Speaking of ambitions, there is something else,” Cersei decides to say.

 

“What is it?”

 

“I have a new case.”

 

Stannis initially looks pleased at the news. “That’s great. What is it?”

 

“I’ll be working on behalf of Martell International in a case against the Bolton’s,” Cersei says, relieved that she finally let it out. 

 

“Martell International? Which Doran is CEO of?”

 

Cersei remembers that he isn’t aware of the change in leadership. “Not anymore. Doran is ill.”

 

“He is? Since when? Who’s the CEO now, then?”

 

“Doran has been ill for awhile, but they’ve kept it a secret.”

 

“But how do _you_ know?” Stannis presses. 

 

“Oberyn told me... at the event we were at.”

 

“And you didn’t tell me?”

 

“You have clients who are enemies of the Martell’s. They could use this against them. Oberyn told me in confidence,” Cersei attempts to explain. 

 

“You thought I would tell them? You don’t trust your own husband not to keep a secret?” Stannis asks her incredulously. 

 

“Stannis, that’s not...”

 

“Who is the new CEO?”

 

“Oberyn.” 

 

Stannis’ brows knit together. “I see. So you’ve taken a case for what is now your ex-boyfriend’s company.”

 

“It is strictly business. I promise.”

 

“Who knows what’ll happen once you two start working in such close proximity on this case, however long it takes.” 

 

“No, it’s not like that,” Cersei responds. 

 

“Let me get this straight. You not only kept things from me... for him, but you took this case knowing exactly how I’d feel about you two working together?” Stannis summarizes. 

 

“Yes, I did, but...” Cersei attempts to explain before she is cut off. 

 

“No. We’re done with this conversation.”

 

Stannis gets up from the couch and exits the room, leaving Cersei alone with her thoughts. 


End file.
